How He Loves

Well friends, it's been a very eventful week. I have been meaning to sit down and write a blog pretty much everyday but I just haven't really had the time. If you have been waiting on a reply to an email, please don't take it personally if it takes me a while. I love you and am praying, but I just get distracted easily haha. But anyways, this will be a long one, so brace yourselves. Here we go!

I will start with the work I have seen Father do first, then I talk about what He has done in me personally.

God keeps bringing people to us, which is very un-Japanese. We have had a woman approach us while we were praying on a bench, a sweet college girl came up to us on the train, and lots of other stories. Yesterday (Friday) my area team went to a university to do some campus ministry. The Journeymen have become friends with a couple of professors here so that is an amazing open door that God has given us here. I really think God is stirring at the campus He has called us to this summer. I struggled with campus ministry last year. I don't know why, mostly fear I guess, but it scared me. The two girls on my team felt the same. We prayed about it, then headed into a hang out spot. I went up to these two girls to ask about English club on campus, but they misunderstood me and pointed to me a place outside the campus, and since she took the time to take me outside and leave her friend, I felt like I needed to stay outside for a while. I was determined to not let fear get the best of me though. After wondering around for a little bit, I finally saw a girl sitting alone on a bench. It was totally a divine appointment. She had pretty much perfect English. She had gone to a Christian school for middle school and high school, so there are seeds planted. We talked for like thirty minutes. It was probably one of the most genuine conversation I've had with a student here. She is my age, and not totally boy crazy. I don't think I have ever met a student my age before. We exchanged information so pray that we will get to meet together and become really good friends, and that ultimately she would come to know Christ.

Today, we had the most interesting 5 minute English experiences I think I have ever been a part of. At the very beginning I talked to this precious woman who was physically handicapped. She could speak really good English, but she had a hard time controlling her movements and talking. She was so excited to practice her English though. She said that she had gone to an art school in New York on scholarship for painting. When she found out that I was a Christian and not a Mormon she gave me a huge hug. I gave her a manga Messiah (anime story of Jesus' life) and my email. She also gave me hers. She really wants to practice her English. And I will gladly practice with her using the Bible. I can't wait to see what God does through these two contacts. Please pray that M-san will be just as excited as the Bible as she is for English and America. Pray that she will be healed body and soul. That was just the beginning of 5ME. It went pretty slow after that until about the last 45 minutes. Then it got crazy. One of my friends was standing next to me and this older man approached us. He couldn't speak too much English, but we understood enough to discover that he's traveled all over America on a Greyhound bus. The man has seen more of the States than I have. Soon after our other two teammates came to join us. Then a guy who is in Japan as a Campus Crusade missionary stopped and talked to one of our guys. It's encouraging to know there are others working here too. Then a man who I think went to college here stopped as well. At this point there are 4 of us and three people who have stopped. Hectic to say the least. Well, the man who had lived in the States had two petitions he wanted us to sign. We are hoping we didn't sign our lives away, but I think it opened doors for us. His shoulder and head were hurt, he said that he had been pushed over by the people he was petitioning to stop. We prayed healing over him and when my friend laid his hand on the man's shoulder, he began to cry. He shook our hands, obviously touched, and left. He came back to give us a calender. We got to talking, and the guy who laid his hand on the man's shoulder got to share about the Holy Spirit and a little bit of what it means to be a Christian. He was interrupted when the clock chimed five, time for our friend to go drinking. It was very obvious that God has been, and is going to continue, working in his life. He said he was going to come to church with us tomorrow. Please pray healing for T-san, heart, soul, and body. He is carrying hurts, pray that God would set him free. Pray for more opportunities to share, and ultimately salvation. I don't think he is very far. All in all, it's been a great first full week of ministry.

Well, now comes what I have been learning. If you need to take a break and come back, go for it. If you want to stop, that's fine too. Just don't forget to pray for the Japanese!

Ok, so I think the biggest thing God has been showing me is that He accomplishes His purposes in His perfect, sovereign timing. That has been beautiful. That is probably going to be a theme for the summer, which I am way excited. I love when God allows bigness moments to just marvel at all He is. Speaking of which, let me tell you how great our God is. Thursday night I was really struggling. Satan knows my weak spots, and as I've heard it said, he magnifies your weakness on the mission field. I know this to be true from experience. I was really having trouble, as girly and ridiculous as this sounds, being patient for my husband. I know, so silly, but it has been a struggle since forever. Honestly, it was just a cover struggle for me not believing God was enough and that He truly knew what is best for me. Satan had been messing with my thoughts all day. I was tired. I hadn't really journaled in a while, so I said goodnight to everyone and busted out the journal. I just spilled it all before the Lord. He gave me peace about it. I knew that I would have freedom from it, but I figured it would be a summer long fight. I went to bed exhausted in every way, but assured that God was in control. After a long but good day of ministry yesterday I stayed at our ministry site because I was supposed to meet a volunteer team there. Well, I thought the were getting there at 5:30 so I just waited around for about 45 minutes for the call from a missionary of the exact time. It came at 6, they weren't going to get there until about 8:15. My heart sank. I felt like I had wasted time. I walked around a little more, found for sure where I was meeting them, then decided to use the time to listen to a podcast or something. I went into McDonald's got a drink and set up shop. I felt like I needed to watch a Breakaway podcast called "The Sacrifice of Isaac". Friends, it was the most freeing sermon I have heard in my life. It was perfect for where I was. Even though I had heard it before, I took notes again. God showed up big time. I saw that once we enter a relationship with God, He does what He needs to until everything in our lives is under His rule. To seek our highest satisfaction in something other than the Lord is death to us. Because of that, the most loving thing He can do is take away what is destroying us. Abraham didn't hesitate when God told him to sacrifice Isaac, the child of promise. It says in Hebrews that Abraham reasoned that God could raise the dead, he knew the true character of God even when he was told to do something that went against all logic and reason. Wow. What faith! What Abraham knew, and I have learned, is that when we trust God with everything, we get to see the beauty of His provision. To receive God's provision we must first get to a place where we can handle it. We must be buried in the dirt until He is all we love and care about. God finally opened my heart to see that when our lives are completely open before Him, we are able to see a to a greater extent, and experience more fully all He is doing in His universe. Through this all, He set me free. I was putting my hope in a man that may not even be out there, and if he is will definitely let me down and not even come close to fulfilling my soul like Jesus.

My world has been completely rocked. I feel like every single worship song I have ever sung I can sing to a great extend. I can now say without a doubt that this Love is greater than life. I don't care if I ever get married or get to be a football mom. I don't really care what happens. Everything melts away in comparison to my Savior, my Redeemer, my Jesus. All else really is rubbish. I cannot even explain the freedom I feel. I never thought it would come this soon. I just wanted to run through the streets singing at the top of my lungs. Everything is different. Thank goodness for miscommunication and that McDonald's in Kichijoji. I am forever changed. I don't care if this summer just goes down hill from here, if I never talk to another Japanese person. If I came for the sole purpose of being set free, that is perfectly ok with me. If you have had this moment, I am sure you rejoice with me. If not, I pray earnestly that you will. Friends, Paul was right: nothing, not one thing, compares to the surpassing greatness of knowing our Savior King. How great is the Father's love for us! I am unaware of any afflictions, eclipsed by His great and mighty glory. I can go on forever, but I will stop for now.

Thank you for reading my ramblings. I love you sweet friends.